 | "DRY DRY DRY! In fact, not only does this tea lack moisture, it seems to absorb it from the human mouth."
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After much deliberation and far too many sips, I have decided to give Archer Farms’ Earl Grey Tea a measly four out of ten rating. Why? Because, simply put, it is at best a second (more likely a third) rate tea. Even compared to common (though very decent) bagged teas like Twining’s Earl Grey, it is a thoroughly sub-par blend with thoroughly sub-par leaves. It was also probably packaged and processed with thoroughly sub-par love.
I am not saying this because Archer Farms’ products are a Target Corporation exclusive. In fact, I went through a rather long period (about three days) of torturous self-doubt and introspective “motive-checking” to make sure a subconscious tea-snobbery wasn’t sneaking up on me and ruining the integrity of this teaview. The old maxim still holds true: The truth will set you free.
So here’s the truth on this tea.
Pros (there’s only one): Kind of like Bruce Lee or a Ford pick-up truck, no one’s ever going to accuse this tea on being weak.
Well, not exactly… one could accuse this tea on being weak on “awesomeness.”
Cons (there are a bunch): DRY DRY DRY! In fact, not only does this tea lack moisture, it seems to absorb it from the human mouth (Like a sponge! Amazing, but gross!). No, this is not a bad UFO movie, this is the consequence of a super-so-so tea.
Usually, the dryness in a tea (even in the “blah” varieties) fades, at least a little, before the tea is swallowed. In Archer Farms’ version, the dryness seems to pick up speed in a most dissatisfying and (frankly) frightening way.
As a result, this tea is unable to have any rhythm whatsoever. What I mean by rhythm is a change in tones throughout the duration of a “sip and swallow.” Most good teas have a certain complexity and flow, which, if in harmony, can be very interesting and enjoyable. Unfortunately, this level of dryness robs the tea of any chance of rhythm, making it a very boring blend.
However, if you are tired of buying tea from trendy labels, are running low on cash or want to support big company store-brands (or a combination of either or all of those reasons), I would bet Archer Farms’ Earl beats Safeway’s or Rite Aid’s (if they have their own) store- blend.
With SinceriTEA,
DL
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